posted by Ammie @ 3:42 AM, ,

The World Famous Coltness Chess and Lap Dance Club
Sunday, July 30, 2006

Coltness Chess and Lap Dance Club is a unique concept in entertainment. First established in 1923 the club struggled for many years trying to raise competitive teams with a dwindling membership. In 1998 the newly elected club president, Mike Andover, made radical changes. By combining lap dancing and chess the club was transformed overnight. In its first year of this new format membership rose from 17 to 203. During that year the teams won 6 major competitions and 2 national dance awards. Suddenly there was silver in the trophy room! We now boast 812 regular members and many members who just like to come from time to time. Our new purpose built club house is open seven days a week. With special playing areas, bars and restaurant you cannot fail to be impressed...

The club is also very proud of its dancers. As well as local talent we regularly invite guest dancers from all around the country. We even have celebrity nights and have seen excellent dance routines from the likes of Paris Hilton and Pamela Anderson. Each night up to six dancers entertain our players between moves. Chess has never been such fun! Lap Dancing has never required so much concentration...

Tours: Our A team, plus two of our full time dancers, have just completed an exhausting two week country wide tour - visiting 12 clubs. Playing a total of 72 games Cotltness A team achieved a remarkable 52 wins and 7 draws...

Visiting Clubs: Recent results -

Coltness A v The Bankies 8-0

Coltness C v Royal Albert 7-1

Coltness D v Yoker Mill 3-5

As always we are delighted to invite clubs to visit us for a friendly challenge. Our club secretary will be happy to arrange dates and select a team of similar grading to your team...

New members are always welcome - come along and give the club a try. Whether novice or grandmaster there is sure to be something at Coltness Chess Club for you. Unfortunately we are not permitted to entertain under eighteens at the club...

Our new club house has several playing areas, two bars and a small but highly rated restaurant...

Dancers - new dancers are always being sought. Top rates paid. If you have never danced around a pole before why not give our amateur night a try - come along any Friday evening...

Franchise Opportunity: Although Coltness is a non profit organisation our tremendous success has resulted in many requests for us to set up more clubs. We have finally succumbed to the pressure! With the help of our friendly bank manager and advisors we have created a franchise - ChesStrip. The first two clubs will be up and running in about two months...

If you are interested in opening up a ChesStrip Club in your area please request our franchise package. Let our expertise be the key to your business success. Applicants must be graded chess players with a keen interest in promoting chess as well as operating a profitable business...

posted by Ammie @ 11:17 PM, ,

WORLD LARGEST POKER TABLE
Thursday, July 20, 2006

posted by Ammie @ 12:35 AM, ,

In life, go straight and turn right.. always and in all ways...
Saturday, July 15, 2006

Understandably, my parents had strong concern and evident fears of what kind of life I'd be able to lead. God provided them strength, wisdom and courage through those early years and soon after that I was old enough to go to school. The law in Australia didn't allow me to be integrated into a main-stream school because of my physical disability. God did miracles and gave my Mom the strength to fight for the law to be changed. I was one of the first disabled students to be integrated into a main-stream school. I liked going to school, and just try to live life like everyone else, but it was in my early years of school where I encountered uncomfortable times of feeling rejected, weird and bullied because of my physical difference. It was very hard for me to get used to, but with the support of my parents, I started to develop attitudes and values which helped me overcome these challenging times. I knew that I was different but on the inside I was just like everyone else. There were many times when I felt so low that I wouldn't go to school just so I didn't have to face all the negative attention. I was encouraged by my parents to ignore them and to try start making friends by just talking with some kids. Soon the students realized that I was just like them, and starting there God kept on blessing me with new friends. There were times when I felt depressed and angry because I couldn't change the way I was, or blame anyone for that matter. I went to Sunday School and learnt that God loves us all and that He cares for you. I understood that love to a point as a child, but I didn't understand that if God loved me why did He make me like this? Is it because I did something wrong? I thought I must have because out of all the kids at school, I'm the only weird one. I felt like I was a burden to those around me and the sooner I go, the better it'd be for everyone. I wanted to end my pain and end my life at a young age, but I am thankful once again, for my parents and family who were always there to comfort me and give me strength. Due to my emotional struggles I had experienced with bullying, self esteem and loneliness, God has implanted a passion of sharing my story and experiences to help others cope with whatever challenge they have in their life and let God turn it into a blessing. To encourage and inspire others to live to their fullest potential and not let anything get in the way of accomplishing their hopes and dreams. One of the first lessons that I have learnt was not to take things for granted.

"And we know that in all things God works for the best for those who love Him." That verse spoke to my heart and convicted me to the point where that I know that there is no such thing as luck, chance or coincidence that these "bad" things happen in our life. I had complete peace knowing that God won't let anything happen to us in our life unless He has a good purpose for it all. I completely gave my life to Christ at the age of fifteen after reading John 9. Jesus said that the reason the man was born blind was "so that the works of God may be revealed through Him." I truly believed that God would heal me so I could be a great testimony of His Awesome Power. Later on I was given the wisdom to understand that if we pray for something, if it's God's will, it'll happen in His time. If it's not God's will for it to happen, then I know that He has something better. I now see that Glory revealed as He is using me just the way I am and in ways others can't be used. I am now twenty-one years old and have completed a Bachelor of Commerce majoring in Financial Planning and Accounting. I am also a motivational speaker and love to go out and share my story and testimony wherever opportunities become available. I have developed talks to relate to and encourage students through topics that challenge today's teenagers. I am also a speaker in the corporate sector.

I have a passion for reaching out to youth and keep myself available for whatever God wants me to do, and wherever He leads, I follow. I have many dreams and goals that I have set to achieve in my life. I want to become the best witness I can be of God's Love and Hope, to become an international inspirational speaker and be used as a vessel in both Christian and non-Christian venues. I want to become financially independent by the age of 25, through real estate investments, to modify a car for me to drive and to be interviewed and share my story on the "Oprah Winfrey Show"! Writing several best-selling books has been one of my dreams and I hope to finish writing my first by the end of the year. It will be called "No Arms, No Legs, No Worries!"

posted by Ammie @ 12:09 AM, ,

World heaviest man...
Wednesday, July 12, 2006

posted by Ammie @ 3:42 AM, ,

BIGGEST BIKE STUNT EVER
Friday, July 07, 2006

U should have guts to attempt this....

posted by Ammie @ 1:51 AM, ,

"Upright Pisser"
Monday, July 03, 2006

"The Many Weird Things Men Look For In A Woman"

posted by Ammie @ 5:00 AM, ,